Sunday Potpourri: That Time of Year

In my morning reading an article in the ADN confirmed that Anchorage suffered through an unusally cold summer. While making a quick run up to the store I noticed the rain drops were just that little bit colder. Then as skies cleared to the east I looked out my front window and saw the view above. No doubt about it. Those leaves are changing. I've fooled myself for probably a week now. But we've gone a couple of shades from green to yellow already. We haven't reached that point where brisk would qualify as an accurate adjective but it really isn't too far off. Likewise I can't quite say I can taste the beginning of the season; that really isn't too far off either.

There's been an unprecedented virtual orgy of attention lavished on Alaska in the last week or so. I can't say that's horrible I suppose. It should at least serve the purpose of educating a numb nuts or two. I heard one suggest that anyone growing up in Alaska does not have that quintessential "Americana" cultural experience and I suppose therefore isn't an American (yes ... it was some idiot on Fox News). I wondered what part of American culture my daughter is missing? And it came to me when I reviewed a conversation I'd had with her a few months back. It's Red Lobster. There has never been one here. I know my daughter would have liked to see an Olive Garden here but I don't think she's lacking because we don't have pasta choices. It isn't that Red Lobster has some seafood variety that you can't get better prepared at any number of restaurants in Alaska. But instead, it's got to be their reasonable prices. Never getting the chance to pay 12.99 for all-you-can-eat crablegs makes her bereft of American culture. If you ask me, it's akin to state-sponsored child abuse. Now let me say this before some local brainiac reminds me that we don't need Red Lobster because we've got Sea Galley and we can still have access to crablegs-a-plenty; I know Red Lobster (I worked at one for one shift) and Sea Galley is no Red Lobster and no catchy jingle is going to change my thinking.

It's also good to see the discussion of Alaska's potential secession from the U.S. come up in the mainstream media. It's been a plank of the Alaskan Independent Party for a long time. It gets jobbed with the whacko label but it makes a lot of sense. There are differences in the depth to which Alaska has acted as a defacto "colony" when compared with classic "colonial" practice. But it has essentially the same characteristics. I think we should make them an offer they can't refuse. I'd think an offer of 80 billion dollars to the U.S. Government for our freedom from their oppression might do the trick (if they refuse ... then just secede by proclamation). Now I know that's a couple of bucks more than Alaska has in its pocket but we can get Fannie Mae to finance the deal over time.

Here's why it makes sense: only Alaskans really know how to make a go of it here. I mean that in the big sense. Any boob can move up here and survive well enough. But in the sense of getting things done there is a palpable but difficult to define characteristic that makes people who've been here their whole life understand the "place" in a way that few in the lower 48 would grasp easily. So if Alaskans really want growth and prosperity then the best path to that would be to secede. We'll gladly host the American Armed Services personnel at the same rates that other third world countries get. We'll gladly throw up some well placed import taxes and the like. And what makes every true Alaskan's mouth water ... we'll develop the hell out of our resources and in no time everyone's permanent fund dividend payment will be worth 5 or 6 thousand dollars a year. Why was Kuwait considered the richest country in the world? Because every citizen (in one way or another) shared hugely in the development of their resources. There are only 670,000 people up here and I think it's reasonable to think that there's a solid 10-12 billion dollars of potential revenue to the state annually if we would secede. At most it's gonna cost 4-5 billion a year to maintain independence. Keep putting the extra 5 billion or so back into the Permanent Fund program and this place would have a massive savings account in a relatively short time. You lower 48 readers might think that all sounds a bit loony. But my Alaskan readers know what I mean and my discussion here isn't the first time the subject has crossed their mind. This place is unique and I have to admit something ... the reasons for that are beyond just the fact that there's no Red Lobster here.

Don't forget to take a look at the scroll bar above when you visit. I've been putting "things" up there without mentioning them down here. The picnic is this Tuesday evening at Kincaid Park from 6-9. And of course don't think I'd forget to mention my season long effort to gain signatures on the "Preserving the Integrity of College Hockey" petition decrying the inclusion of shootouts. Where is that bad boy you ask? How can you add your name to the list of people that don't want to witness that abortion of a circus act in our game? Wait for it on the scroll and then move your mouse onto the scroll area and click the highlighted text.

Lastly, I beg you to always remember that time itself is nothing more than a quantum artifact of the physical laws which govern our universe (it is not a force or a property). Don't ever think that there is really any way that you can "have" time. But remember that it always "has" you.