Sunday, February 03, 2008

Sunday Potpourri: Dumb Shit Edition

I ain't about dumb shit. When something is dumb I just have to say so. Does this ugly plagarizing dumb shit bimbo have any friends? If she does they need to inform her about this garment invited quite a few years ago called a "Turtle Neck" sweater. Any non-transgendered (for those of you in Fargo that means men that had a sex change) female unlucky enough to be born with a grotesquely masculine neck like that really ought to cover it up. Please. You dumb shit ... get a modicom of sense even if you have to buy it from Pat Buchanan. And who are the dumb shits taking pictures of this Arayan nightmare and putting them in the media. Stop it you dumb shits. If I wanted to see a horror show I'd go to Friday The 13th part XXIV.

The next dumb shit thing is having a rule in a sport that allows a team to stop the game and ask for a review. I was flipping channels just now and saw the New England Patriots get a 1st down because a guy was running off the field and was 2 or 3 feet from the sideline when the ball was snapped on a field goal attempt. How stupid is that? Here's a sport where the guy running off the field had absolutely nothing to do with the outcome of the play and yet one team can "challenge" it and gain from the meaningless incident. Don't get me wrong here. I could give a shit about the Super Bowl and/or who wins it (I assure you I'm happier watching "How its Made"). But that is some dumb shit for a sport to have. I guess it is some sort of pandering addition to make all the whiney sports fans happy. The same sort of dumb shit is coming down the road when the NCAA adopts the ridiculous dumb shit of shootouts. If you're a sports fan and you don't have a sense of appreciation for what a tied game means then stick with the NFL or the NHL or the totally dumb shit sport of Crotch Scratching Tobacco Chewers (Baseball). Allow Division 1 hockey to reamain pure would ya? Please.

I'm mostly happy with some of the changes that UAA's arena audio guy has made. I like "Sweet Caroline" even if it is stolen from BU (but let's at least honor their tradition and play it only between the 2nd and 3rd periods eh?). I think the choices of songs between plays is better than in the past; Foreigner's "Cold as Ice" directed at the referee is a nice subtle thing. I also like that the audio guy recognizes at times to forego playing anything in order for the crowd to be heard. Props for all that ... BUT here is the dumb shit. Playing niggling little "waa waaaa waaaaaaa" after the other team scores is out of line. Playing a stupid "DEE-FENSE stomp stomp DEE-FENSE stomp stomp" clip has got to stop. The first is classless and weak; the second is just straight up dumb shit because it comes from a dumb shit sport. Please Please Please stop these. If you're the audio guy and reading this, I'm begging you. If you know the audio guy and read this then I beg you to intervene on my behalf. If we didn't play pretty much any of the non-musical clips I'd be happier. I really don't want to hear "You da Man" when Olthuis stops the puck; or "Buh Bye Buh Bye" when the opponent takes a penaly; or little nuggets from "King of the Hill" either. If it isn't music ... please stop. This isn't the ECHL. We're better than those sorts of dumb shit little blurbs aren't we?

Now onto a note to myself. Hey dumb shit, don't even seven breakfast sausages in one sitting. Yes I know they are tasty and juicy delectable little tubes of pig-meat heaven but seriously deary ... did you have to eat seven of them? Was your guilt about the starving children in Africa so great that you couldn't waste just one of them by tossing it?

Curtis Glencross was traded this week from the Columbus Blue Jackets to the Edmonton Oilers for overpriced defenseman Dick Tarnstrom. Oilers fans not familiar with Curtis' fine attributes were a bit confused about the move. So I sent an email to the fine CoveredInOil blog to educate them about exactly what they were getting. Hopefully, in the next year or so Blue Jackets GM Scott Howson will feel like a dumb shit.

Now for something that definitely doesn't make today's dumb shit list. UAA's coaching staff. In a conversation this weekend at the rink "dude from USCHO" made the case to me (and I whole-heartedly agree) that Shyiak et al have done a tremendous job in maintaining the team's belief in themselves. The players looked confident and they played confidently. All hail to the staff for keeping that level of confidence up there. We all know that a team which believes it can accomplish anything is a team that can accomplish anything. If you watched this team much this year I think you have to believe that they are more than capable of making a nice run down the stretch. Good on ya UAA coaches; Good on ya. You're all the opposite of dumb shits eh ... three smart cookies.

31 comments:

MeanEgirl said...

I agree with your bit on the Superbowl game stuff. That was a retarded thing. Oh well... the game is over now... and the ending was amazing.

Oh, and UAA needs a band. Cut all that other crap out. I'm sure enough musical talent can be found from 18,000 students. A band would add awesome atmosphere to the arena.

Btw, NOTHING is worse than that stupid howling in the Sully. =P

Donald Dunlop said...

But not on the Ann Coulter stuff? OMG. Please don't be one of the nutjobs that thinks that dumb shit is anything other than a dumb shit.

Jeff said...

FINALLY! Somebody else mentions it. I've been pushing for a band for a while but nobody listens to me. Even the nooks have a band. why cant we?

szzz said...

We use-ta have a band... Apparently they were a "fair weather band"...

After last nights game I was feeling a little bummed that we gave up 2 goals in the 3rd and ended with a tie. Then today I watched the Montreal v. NYR game on the tube and witnessed the Canadians take their 3-0 lead into the middle of the second period only to give up 5 unanswered goals, yup 5, count em... Great for Scotty and Dubie as they each got one of the 5 but seeing a PRO team cough up a 3 goal lead and loose by 2 made me feel alot better about the tie last night...

Anonymous said...

we dont have a band because squarbanks dose there is no money in the budget why cause they get the money we get the students. FUCK squarebanks.

Anonymous said...

You should have had 4 points this weekend....I'd call out your team's 3rd period meltdown a little more. 3 is nice, but hard to swallow when 4 was staring you in the face.

Dave in So. Anch. said...

You're darn right they need a band. Having a pep band is HUGE for pumping up the players and fans. And they need a real school fight song. Places like Mariucci have a magical feeling when you have the players skate out and the entire arena comes to their feet clapping to the school song. Anchorage fans should have that too. Then again, a new arena would help in so many ways. Geez Sullivan is an ugly arena. Even if they could renovate the Sully it would help. Take out all of the seats and put in some cloth cushioned seats that are Seawolf green.

Donald, I totally agree on the DJ. The DE-FENSE chant he plays makes me cringe every time he plays it. This is hockey, not football. It's like if the wolves stop em from scoring in our zone for 2 minutes straight the visitors have to punt the puck to us from their blueline or what?

Anonymous said...

The big excuse has been that the Fans/boosters dont want a band because it is to loud..This is College right..??lets face it we need to revamp everything..Marketing,sales,atmosphere,approach,gametime intermissions,reporting, MUSIC,NEW FAN Recruiting..Wins will help but you got to give are current overall very low marks and the true barometer is Fans in the Stands..Its UGLY and wont change itself.

Anonymous said...

so true so true, the booster club sucks at UAA, we need some new blood in there and it wouldn't be as loud as the arena horn i don't hear those bitches complaining about that.

Anonymous said...

haha its so true!
and i dont blame you for eating so many sausage links..i do it too

Jeff said...

I figured I'd check out your blog and see how AA did this weekend. Rough weekend for you Donald? Lose some big bucks betting against the Giants?

What's up with all the hating on Ann Coulter? I'm normally well informed on current events. I usually get to catch an hour or so of the Fair and Balanced Fox News. Occasionally I'll have some time for Bill O'Reilly. If I'm lucky, my radio at night will tune into 1110 am out of Ohmaha for the Michael Savage Show. And normally, I'm able to listen to Mark Levin for 1/2 and hour to an hour a day. I figured I must have missed something recently about Ann Coulter. Googled her...the most recent thing that came up was way back in October. Nothing at all about her on the Drudge either. Are you still getting your news via pony express via the Alaskan highway? Maybe you just had to use your quota of "dumb shit" for the day?

Everyone in Fargo thanks you again Donald for the vocabulary lesson. You're mom must be very proud of you.

Jeff said...

I must have been so caught up in the UND-UM series, and Super Bowl this weekend that I somehow missed Coulter's interview on Hannity and Colmes. I can see where she's coming from. However, I'm hoping that she's getting people to get out and vote for Romney tomorrow. I don't know that McCain would be any better/worse than Hillery.

BTW, you've got to admit that Coulter looks pretty good for a 47 year old ;)

Donald Dunlop said...

jeff:
My deceased mothers pride notwithstanding; are you really trying to belittle me in some way for my use of words uncommon to the rabble of your podunk hovel? That's pricelessly ironic ...

As to the worthiness of my post as some sort of "current events" response you are "right"; it has no relevance to any particular news item. It however does have plenty of relevance to the subject of "dumb shits". And naturally I'd like to thank you for your contribution.

The knowledge that you look to the site of a closeted-homosexual right wing nutbag like Drudge for ANY SORT of relevant information about ANYTHING is quite revealing; not to mention hilarious.

And could I have been any clearer about my interest in the NFL? LOL. Lose money betting on it? Um ... I saw 2.5 minutes of the game. I didn't hear the final score until 2AM when I was in the car and the radio was still on ESPN network.

Wow. Just wow dude. LMFAO @ you.

Donald Dunlop said...

I just threw up in my mouth at the thought that anyone (even someone in Fargo) thinks that dumb shit ugly hag is attractive.

Anonymous said...

Happy to see Glencross n Edmonton-Go Oilers! and as always, GO SEAWOLVES!

"Barry Goldwater" said...

Hey Jeff, Ann is hot and to top it off she is conservative! If she would just tone it down a little on the some issues, she might be more accepted by the mainstream. Now I know that Donald is Left of Ted Kennedy, so I wouldn't expect that he would see anything appealing about Ms Coulter. No Big deal, we still love you Donald. Keep up the good work on the blog and GO SEAWOLVES!

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 12:40, you are so right. It all needs a breath of life! From marketing (or lack of), to sales, atmosphere, gametime intermissions, reporting, music, etc, etc, etc.

How many different coaching staff's will have to be responsible for losing seasons before we realize the man at the top is coming up short?

Bottom line, Cobb isn't getting it done. They need to promote the team, they need a PR person. Hockey is THE flagship program at UAA, but you'd never know it.

Donald Dunlop said...

Barry:
LOL. Nice of you to show up.

Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice?

Just thinking of touching Miss bat-wing eared man-handed Adams-appled Leno-chinned freak show Arayan trollop is enough to make my skin crawl.

Sorry Barry ... the vice of touching that whore is too extreme.

And for the record ... I'm quite a bit left of Marx and Engels.

Thanks for reading.

Anonymous said...

Ok Donald back to hockey whats the story on this Finucci kid thats leading the BCHL in points..65 assists tell me the sea slugs couldnt use a playmaker...Did he play Major Junior????

Donald Dunlop said...

About Finucci:

He has a "transcript" on his BCHL profile. Hasn't committed anywhere. Won't be playing junior hockey after this year.

I can't imagine that UAA hasn't looked and/or talked with him at some point. That said ... UAA has two players coming in next year. It's hard to say if there'll be any losses to the roster other than Seniors ... so I'll go with the assumption that all the underclassmen on the current roster come back ...

That will give UAA 14 forwards on the roster. The big question isn't whether Finucci is a possibility for UAA but whether UAA needs to add another forward to the roster.

If they wanted to add a 15th forward Finucci would be a nice addition. However, let's be aware that there is only so much schollie money available. The NCAA allows 18 scholarships. In past years UAA split those 18 amongst all it's rostered non-walkons. I've no idea if Shyiak and staff adhere to that principle. That is an important consideration because in my mind if Finucci hasn't committed yet perhaps it is because he hasn't gotten the offer he wants. Either it hasn't come from the school he is hoping for ... or ... none of the schools he's talked to have said "full boat" to him.

With all that in mind ... I'd say it's realistic to expect to see his name on a committed list during the spring signing period but not necessarily realistic to see UAA next to it.

All that is total speculation on my part.

As for other schools ... UAF definitely pitched hard to the guy. I'm not sure what YODA is up to in Craptasticville with 12 underclassmen due back next season and 4 recruits already committed. Perhaps a couple (or more) of Tavis's players will get their walking papers to make room for "his" Jedi Knights. We'll have to wait and see.

Suze said...

If I were being recruited by UA_, I'd look REALLY HARD at the roster situation, and ask myself how Yoda is going to treat those players who have already been given scholarships to play for the Nanooks. Doesn't look good, somebody IS going to get screwed.

Anonymous said...

Football has clearly defined rules enforced by enough officials to make sure that total mayhem does not break out with every snap. Hockey (and don't get me wrong I love it) has rules based loosely on WWF 20 man battle royale's. Officiated by 2 guys or 1 or 1.5 that must be blind or do not know how to put 2 and 2 together and blow their whistle when a foul takes place right in front of them. Clearly you do not have to actually know the rules of hockey to be a hockey ref. Besides the rules are Canadian (eh) and look what they did to football. MM

Anonymous said...

I'd rather watch the CFL then the NFL anyday, eh. Your superbowl was a joke. In the weeks leading up to the 'game' all emphasis was on what player was screwing who and would she bring bad luck, blah blah.........eh.

Donald Dunlop said...

MM:
Briefly (and believe me i could go on and on) ...

Football ...
1/4 of the team on the field at any time
8 seconds of action then 30 seconds of rest
6 seconds of action then 30 seconds of rest
and again and again except for
the 6 timeouts per team per game

Hockey ....
1/3 of the team on the ice at any time
30-40 seconds of skating/hitting per shift
1 minute to 1.5 minutes of rest
Action only stops for goals, goalie saves, infractions, injury or if the puck leaves the ice.
1 timeout per team per game

WWF? I have to rhetorically ask if you are really favorably comparing hockey to faux-sports soap-opera entertainment designed to mollify the trailer-trash?

Anonymous said...

Yoda in Craptasticville is funny as shit!!!!!Lets face it Ann Coititus is a frigging Dumb ASS BROAD.I wouldnt hit that with YODA,S WEWE..

bubba said...

Now if you posted a pic of HIliary I may never ever come back to your blog! JK, I love your blog to much, it's kinda like a car wreck, you just gotta stop and look. Keep up the good work and Go OBama!!!!

Anonymous said...

Nah, Donald WWF is just funning with your crowd.
I love both games Hockey and Football. The way a hockey game is called by refs can be very frustrating. MM

Jeff said...

I'm positive that I followed up to Donald's reply to my comment on the great, sexy, Ann Coulter...oh well, I'm over it now, as I'm sure Donald is...I'm sure he'll claim he won another one...maybe I can find it on my computer somewhere...

Anonymous said...

Yeah Donald, don't have the audio guy do anything to get the crowd into the games. Don't do anything to get the atmosphere in the sully up during UAA games. Keep the same as it's always been and you'll always have the 1500 fans there. It will never change but I believe that's what you want.

Donald Dunlop said...

anon@554:
If playing "waaaa waaaaaaaaa waaaaaaaaaaaa" after the other team scores was actually something that would get butts in seats then I'd be all about it. But neither it nor playing "DEE-FENSE stomp stomp" is going to affect the number of people that buy tickets in any way.

Note that I did compliment the audio guy for better music as well as for realizing that sometimes the music overrides the crowd noise.

So by my count .... 2 compliments to the audio guy and I begging for a change.

Maybe you're right though ... maybe we could find some Monty Python clips and say "Ni" ... or how about JJ from Good Times saying "Dyno-MITE" ... or perhaps Billy Crystal doing his Ricardo Montelban impression saying "Maahhhvelous". Hmmm ... I see hundreds of people lining up to buy tickets.

WhiteBeard said...

Jeff,

Think Mz Anna “looks pretty good for a 47 year old” drag Nazi? Well I’d say she probably looks better than Der Dicke, ol’ Herman but not as good as Butch Goering.

Hm … Butch Coulter … now that’s a thought.

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